Includes high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more. Paying supporters also get unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app.
Purchasable with gift card
name your price
about
#sayhername is heavy on my mind.
I'm still suffering from a concussion. Everything is still in a fog. The colors of the world are dull but hurt my eyes. The sounds all mesh together in a droll but they still hurt my ears. Im so irritated but I don't even know why anymore. I know I have freedoms in these moments of lucid contemplations I've never imagined before. I know I have love around me. She, however, did not.
I think back to my childhood. Watching my well known amongst the public servants Mother's head being beaten on the roof of the police vehicles, red white and blue lights flashing. I remember the gazed look in her eyes. I know now how she felt. I know now that each time it happened it just got worse, it just got harder to shake.
Sandra Bland has been heavy on my mind. Violence and, not just police brutality but human brutality. non-humane human brutality. Across the sexes and races but more poignantly, across the generations of souls that have been clamoring for freedom since the beginning of time.
I wrote a poem, using my own herrendous concussion experiences and what little facts about Sandra's interaction and death, paired with thought's of my Mother as it gets close to her Birthday.
This is it.
lyrics
After I took the blow to the head I couldn’t feel the structural damage at the microscopic level, MY DYING CELLS couldn’t be heard.
My membranes were stretched and twisted. The potassium exiting my cells triggered them to depolarize and then I saw the stars while a band trumpeted loudly inside my ears. I couldn’t even hear.
My neurons couldn’t fire any longer, my cells began to shut down, spreading depression throughout my brain.
So many cells became depressed that I lost consciousness for a moment.
My brain was overrun by glucose and lactic acid. I didn’t know who I was. I didn’t know where I was. I knew I was in a struggle. I didn’t recognize the face of the eyes staring down at me.
I could feel my heartbeat in my temple and then it just stopped.
With no potassium left, calcium entered each cell quickly.
Before I knew it I was in holding. I was confused, irritated, in a fog.
The colors of life were dull but painful to look at. My orange suit hurt my eyes, the bright lights made me want to shield my face. The sounds rang in my ears like an echoing cavern. No one listened to my cries.
I did nothing wrong. I needed help. I was the victim though I was being held as the prisoner even though I had done nothing wrong. failure to signal. He pulled me from my car. I do mind putting out my cigarette!
I was never going to get out. I would never feel freedom again. I would live in this fog for the rest of my days. the sights and sounds of the world around me hurt in the most unpleasant way. Everything was wrong. I was so dizzy, I couldn’t push any further.
I had to end it. My head was heavy.
It took only a moment for me to make the decision that would end my life. All was waste. The sound was so crunchy like sneaking chips DURING a movie. You killed me with my own hands.
This album by Kenyan electronic producer rPH and poet Kins of Spade reflects on the impact of religion in their lives and society. Bandcamp New & Notable May 12, 2023
Poet Douglas Kearney and composer/producer/drummer Val Jeanty link up for a a compelling LP that feels like the written word come to life. Bandcamp New & Notable Mar 30, 2021
On her new EP, Japanese producer Mikado Koko deconstructs the traditional, mixing avant-garde vocals and glitch breaks with koto. Bandcamp New & Notable Dec 15, 2020
In a lane all his own, aint about me lays moody spoken word over rippling soundscapes on songs that feel cinematic in scope. Bandcamp New & Notable Nov 23, 2020
